December 9th, 2005


I kvetch about rap shows

Back from MF Doom. I'm sick (coughing, sore throat-- possibly typhoid) but I went anyway because I had to HOLD IT DOWN FOR MY PEEPS, REPRESENT 415 TO THA FULLEST, etc etc. Also the ticket was $30.

The show was ok, but goddamn, hip hop shows are such a pain in the ass! I got there at 10:45 and Doom didn't even come on till past midnight. Doors were at 8:30! I got so bored waiting that I had to leave the show to go buy some sour gummy bears and an Utne Reader. (This was the only non-pornographic magazine the corner store had.) "Utne" rhymes with "chutney," in case you were wondering, which you probably weren't. I think it's targeted at aging hippies. Note to self: next time buy porn.

signs you're at a hip hop show:

1) there's a bunch of dudes on stage who are just standing around doing nothing
2) it's been 3 hours and the main act is still backstage smoking pot
3) grown men are barking orders at you... look I'll throw my hands up when the time is right ok? you're not the boss of me

I liked when he pretended he was gonna stagedive, and three of his hypemen pretended to hold him back... (Mr. Dumile has a prodigious belly & would have crushed any San Fran hipsters unfortunate enough to be under him when he landed)

Time to knock back a shot of Cherry Nyquil. I'll leave you with my favorite Doom song, which of course he didn't do. Mad Scooby love nevertheless.

Zoiks! This place is filled with pretender willies
One false move, and get broke off, like end of phillies

MF Doom - Hey!
Fondle 'Em, 1999